Pushing Past the Barriers — No Stone Left Unturned

I had the most incredible week. I spent the first few days and nights at a caregiver retreat in Red Feather Lakes, Colorado put on by the No Barriers organization.

Have you heard of No Barriers? I hadn’t until a fellow member of one of the local Facebook groups that I follow posted about the upcoming retreats in Colorado and attached a link to the application. I happened to be settling in for the evening when I came upon the post, so I clicked the link. Individuals that are caregivers for a loved one were invited to apply for the free retreat.

I noticed that the deadline was looming and knew that I needed to fill out the application that evening if I wanted to be considered. A retreat would be just the thing I needed to continue on my journey of learning to focus on self-care. I was honored to be one of twelve chosen out of seven hundred applicants.

Per www.nobarriersusa.org, their mission states, “Now, more than ever, we need to believe that What’s Within Us Is Stronger Than What’s In Our Way. Through transformative online and in-person experiences, tools and inspiration, we help people tap into their inner hope, optimism and resilience. In the process, we foster a community of curious, brave and collaborative explorers who are determined to live the No Barriers Life.

People are struggling with isolation, a loss of community, mental health challenges, fear and uncertainty. 2020 reminds us that none of us is immune to struggle. Adversity doesn’t care about race, class, creed, color, job title or location. No Barriers has helped tens of thousands of people facing these very issues for the past twenty years—by tapping into the light inside of each of us that knows we can get through it. Despite the barriers—both big and small—that each of us face, we can learn how to push past them, reconnect with our purpose, and unleash the best in ourselves and others.”

The website gives the history of how No Barriers developed into the organization it is today. Be sure to go check it out, it’s an amazing story of how the right people came together to build their dream of helping others.

Per the website,

Our Primary Program Areas:

The No Barriers Summit is a multi-day in-person and virtual event that will inspire you with speakers, and showcase cutting-edge innovations. You will choose from dozens of adaptive activities that will help you and your family break through barriers and connect with our community. Regardless of your ability, you will leave forever changed.

No Barriers Warriors improves the lives of veterans with disabilities through curriculum-based experiences that help veterans reconnect with purpose, rediscover identity and find community.

No Barriers Youth is a premier educational program challenging students to find hope and optimism despite the many challenges we face. We do this through transformative experiences, classroom tools, and real-world inspiration.

No Barriers Caregivers provides support to family caregivers for adult and youth to find balance in their lives.

No Barriers Educators provides classroom tools and resources to help classrooms learn the skills and mindset to break through challenges.

I met the most amazing people. One of them was Heather Zoccali. “In 2019, Heather brought the Arch Foundation into No Barriers to serve caregivers. Since that time, the caregiver program has grown and received national acclaim for filling an important niche.”

We had several program leaders. The program leaders participated in caregiver retreats in the past. They gained so much from their own retreats that they wanted to pay it forward. Every one of them was amazing and supportive. Every one of them is a caregiver, but still took time away from their family to support us on our journey.

It was surprising how fast all of us participants bonded. We came from all walks of life. We came from different caregiving situations. We came from all over the US; California, Illinois, Montana, New York, Florida and Colorado.

I learned a long time ago that being in nature fills my bucket. Tracy and I bought a home on acreage in the foothills for exactly that reason. Many of the participants were from larger cities such as Chicago and Buffalo. It was fun for me to see nature’s beauty through their eyes. One person commented that it was the first time she had seen stars in a very long time. A couple of my tent mates stayed up to view the moon.

I did have a little fun with my new friends, teasing them on occasion, “C’mon city folk”, when they did something city like!

During our time at the Red Feathers campus we learned about the No Barriers Life Elements. Per their website,

The No Barriers Life Elements are as follows:

Vision: Vision is designing a purpose that inspires you to give your best back to the world. Vision is almost like a map that guides us to where we want to be in our lives; it is our purpose and our goals in life.
Reach: Reach is an element that focuses on moving beyond your comfort zone. It is a call to challenge yourself, to push further than you ever have so that you can grow as a person.
Pioneer: To pioneer through challenges is to use creative thinking and problem solving in order to overcome your barriers.
Rope Team: Your rope team is your support network. It is a team of people that you can collaborate and connect with to build a strong community. Your expedition team will be your rope team while in the field.
Alchemy: The element of alchemy encourages participants to take their life experiences and turn them into something positive.. It means cultivating optimism and resiliency in the face of difficult challenges.
Summits: Summits are the gifts that we earn through perseverance; acknowledging the work and struggle behind our achievements and victories.
Elevate: To live an elevated life, participants are encouraged to impact the world and those around them by serving as a leader in their communities, sharing their experiences and what they have learned along the way.

The No Barriers Life framework is the basis for No Barriers curriculum and experiences across all program areas. No Barriers developed these elements to exemplify the mindset and actions that allow us to break through barriers, unleash individual and collective potential, and have a positive impact on the world.

We spent some time between activities journaling. Writing about how you’re feeling helps one to process their emotions. I journal weekly, I call it my blog, and all of you are out there supporting me with your love and comments!

One of our journaling exercises was to make a self-care pledge. We were tasked with creating a vision of what we want our life to look like. Our pledge was to be one small, simple and attainable step in one of the following self-care categories:

Physical - nutrition, exercise, sleep…
Emotional - therapy, journaling…
Professional - setting work boundaries, learning new skills, obtaining new degree or certification…
Spiritual - meditation…
Social - finding support groups, going out with friends…
Financial - getting will or trusts in order…
Intellectual - reading, researching, listening to podcasts…
Practical - delegating tasks, keeping a list of how others can help…

We learned the importance of scheduling time for ourselves. No more saying, “I don’t have time for that”, when it comes to the things we want to do.

I committed to getting back to yoga, whether that be in a class or at home. Now that you know, you all can hold me accountable.

One of the things that Heather said that resonated with me was to evaluate the “Return to Self”. We take time to evaluate the return on our investments. She explained that we need to evaluate how we spend our time and determine if we are getting a return to self. I think that is what I did when I decided to take a break from CASA.

In the beginning, mentoring the CASA kiddos and being their voice in court made me feel good. I knew I was making a difference in their lives. After three cases in a row that amounted to over six years of non-stop heart-wrenching situations, I realized it was causing me constant raw heartache. I realize now that I was no longer receiving a “return to self”. This volunteer position was no longer serving me.

The Red Feathers Lake mountain campus is in the process of completing their 2022 building project to create an accessible space for outdoor adventure and wellness. The project is still a work in progress, but nothing could get this group down! We did our thing around all the construction.

We had opportunities to participate in a ropes course, rock-climbing wall, hiking, paddleboarding, kayaking, and self-care crafting. We had four crafting stations. I made a vanilla scented sugar scrub and a peppermint scented roller ball.

One of our last activities was writing one word on each of the attendee’s No Barriers flag that we thought best represented them. These are the words on my flag: strength, lover, wise, awesome, grace, advocate, caring, determined, inspiring, beautiful, brave, leader and steady. What do you think? Did they get it right?

One of my new friends from the retreat just published a book in February on caregiving. I’ve already ordered it and you can bet that I will be quoting from it in the future. It’s called, “Navigating The Caregiver River, A Journey to Sustainable Caregiving”, by Theresa Wilbanks. I mentioned to Theresa that I wanted to publish a book of my own and she said that she would help me make it happen! She thinks that her team would love our story.

I plan to stay in touch with and support my rope team from the retreat. It was an incredible experience that I will never forget.

My week finished with a weekend at the cabin with Tracy, the kids, and the grandkids. We celebrated Father’s Day after cutting down and cleaning up twenty-five more dead trees. We have cut down and cleaned up hundreds of trees with hundreds more to go! We did go for an ATV ride too!

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at it’s destination full of hope.” - Maya Angelou

“Being challenged in life is inevitable, being defeated is optional.” - Roger Crawford